When I was a little girl, I was
raised to be obedient... By my grandmothers.
I was taught to say yes ma'am, no
ma'am or yes sir, no sir in the face of authority. Question nothing and accept
that authority knows what's best.
They hadn't been prepared for the
time I spent with my mother.
When I watched the Sandra Brown
Arrest video, I have to admit, with all my heart, that I was stunned.
Every word Sandra Brown spoke to
Brian Encinia was testy, aggressive, argumentative, and belligerent.
I probably would have slapped her
about 30 seconds into the conversation.
Sandra Brown was taught to trust no
one. She was taught to fight everything... To question everything. She lived to
challenge authority.
When Michael Brown was stopped in Ferguson for allegedly
stealing a box of cigars, instead of calmly getting in the car, he defiantly
ran.
When Eric Garner was confronted by
the police for selling individual cigarettes, he held up his hands in
surrender, but began to argue with the officers.
And then there is the student in South Carolina arguing
with the teacher to the point that a school police officer was brought in and
things got nasty.
Second grade was especially tough
for me.
Mrs. Smith was the teacher from
hell.
It was so bad that two kids started
peeing their pants again. I started having bad dreams... It didn't help that we
lived across the street from the school and I felt that she was watching my
every move.
One of my grandmothers saw and
noted the change in behavior and decided to investigate. She walked into the
school one day (back then, it was possible), and she caught Mrs. Smith yelling
and screaming at us. My grandmother went ballistic and told Mrs. Smith that she
never wanted to catch Mrs. Smith even looking cross-eyed at me again.
Mrs. Smith never looked at me
again. She never pointed at me when I raised my hand. She never let me answer a
question. She put me in the back of the room and literally ignored my
existence. Her pen made cut marks through my paper with boldly printed F's.
It took a lot of for me to recover
from that woman and learn self respect. It took scores of As from other
teachers to convince me that I had any brains in my head.
It's amazing what one teacher can
do to a life.
Today, if a teacher pulled this on
a class, it would be put on every social media site available. Lawsuits would
be filed. And that teacher would be unemployed rapidly.
To defy or not to defy authority...
That is the question.
I don't think that my mother ever
had a problem with me questioning her
authority. We both knew that she was tougher and meaner than me. And we both
knew that she was smarter than I am, any day and twice on Sunday.
My mother taught me to question
everything... Including her.
It was never about disrespecting
anyone. It was never about demands, name calling, arrogance, or defiance. It
was about questioning everything.
"Yes, officer, here are my
registration, driver's license, and insurance. By the way sir, may I see the
radar?"
So I watch all of these videos with
both sides being aggressive, and honestly, find fault with the triggers that
the authority figures respond to, and the respect that is sadly lacking from
the conversation.
I don't remember police officers in
my high school. And this was at a time when bullies were praised for their
aggression (because it would make a "man" out of ya) and LSD, pot,
heroin, and plethora of other drugs floated around like driftwood at a boat
crash.
I remember teachers lowering grades
at behavior that was unacceptable. Wondering if one had the grades to get into
college was a big deal, and disruptive behavior went on your score card.
It was the ultimate power of a
teacher.
And then teachers started abusing
it. The favorite students started getting the favorable As for behavior and the
not so favorite would be forgotten or marked down. Athletes graduated from high
school without ever learning to read.
And this is where the authority of
the teacher began to diminish.
I actually watched my first episode
of cops, yesterday... It had never appealed and I must say that I probably
won't watch it again. But I saw the same defiant behaviors in this 30 minute
show, as I have been seeing in the news.
When the suspects were told to put
up their hands, they either ran, yelled and screamed, or stood rebelliously and
pugnaciously confronting the police officers.
I know that a lot of distrust has
been foisted on police officers, and I do understand that mistrust. From the
sixties and their racial profiling (yes, I realize it still goes on today), to
being part of the KKK, to abusive, rapists that call themselves police officers,
to the shoot first and ask questions later cops.
There are bad cops out there.
Anybody who says differently is a liar.
There are bad people out there in
every race, creed, religion, occupation, gender, LGBTQ, judges, police
officers, politicians, celebrities, there are even bad pastors/religious
leaders (sorry if that's a shock to anyone, but it shouldn't be).
Give certain types of people a
little bit of authority or power, and you are giving them a weapon from whence
the beating will come. It's just a fact of life.
Some of my favorite people in
history had very questionable natures.
President Abraham Lincoln, who
emancipated slaves, and because he did, I adore him. But history shows another
side to this man. He was ruthless
about getting his way and winning.
The Emancipation Proclamation was
not really about freeing the slaves, it was about a war of attrition and
"he who has the most troops wins." And Abraham Lincoln knew that he
didn't have the troops to send down South. He wanted people that knew the
terrain of the South and he wanted sacrificial victims that he could easily
count without remorse.
He rolled those dice and became a
hero to the slaves.
Maybe that is a grim way of looking
at the past, but it is also very true. Abraham Lincoln didn't expect too many
slaves to survive the incursion.
The event at Selma taught us a lot of different things:
1. The
power of the media to capture evil, even when they are trying to hide the evil
2. Bad
things happen when good men do nothing.
3. Evil
can be fought without violence or fury.
Martin Luther King strongly
discouraged anger and rebellion, and yet he won a victory welding a mighty
thought: That all people are created equal. It wasn't his original thought, but
it was an echo from wise men throughout history.
Gandhi and Chavez repeated this
idea and refused to endorse violence. They even fasted when their own people
rebelled against the thought that great deeds can be done without a gun or a
fist.
While my mother taught me to
question everything, she also taught me that there is a time to question
authority.
When a police officer is making an
arrest, 99.9% of the time (just a number off the top of my head), he/she is
doing his/her job. When he/she writes a ticket, he/she pulled you over because
you were driving too fast, or one of your tail lights wasn't working. Does it
matter?
Arguing with them is not going to
change the fact that you were driving too fast, or that your tail light wasn't
working.
Asking them politely to show you
the radar registration for your own visual is not an affront to their
authority. It is information that validates or invalidates their reason for
stopping you.
Your battle is never with them and
your voice doesn't need to be heard then.
That is what our court system is for. This is where your voice can be heard.
Twenty years ago, I was pulled over
for going 40 MPH in a 30 MPH residential area. I handed my license,
registration, and insurance documentation out the window as the police officer
walked up to my car, before he even said anything.
I asked to see the radar and he
showed it to me.
And then I went to court and fought
it.
I calmly explained that both roads
leading onto the street were 35 MPH. I also pointed out that there were no signs
that marked that street as residential. There were several businesses and
churches on that street. I also said that I would be quite happy to pay the
fine for going 5 MPH over the speed limit.
The county attorney nodded at the
judge and shrugged his shoulders. He accepted my offer, and let me go with a
warning.
Several months later, speed limit
signs were put up on that street... 35 MPH!!!!
Maybe that isn't the big CHANGE
that everyone wants in their life. but I presented my argument in the place
where it was meant to be, not belligerently in the face of the officer, but in
court. And I changed things.
I encourage you to use your words! I challenge you to
accept fate with passion, and withhold the anger.
Most of all, I defy you to use your
defiance at the right place and time. To fight the good fight on the battle
ground, and not sitting in your car with a person that is more than likely just
there to do a job.






